The Road To Happiness
by EyJB
Summary: This story is set in New Moon. Alice convinces Bella to follow her to Italy to save Edward. Barely landed in Italy, Bella receives terrible life changing news. Her mother was killed in an car accident. Bella decides to go to Jacksonville immediately, instead of going any further with Alice. She asks Jake for help.
1. Chapter 1

**The Road To Happiness**

Part I

 **Rated: M**

 **This story is set in New Moon. Alice convinces Bella to follow her to Italy to save Edward. They barely landed in Italy, when Bella receives terrible life changing news. Her mother was killed in an car accident. Bella decides to go to Jacksonville immediately, instead of going any further with Alice. She asks Jake for help.**

 **Follow our favorite couple as they deal with guilt, grieve, and painful memories. Slowly their friendship turns into more...**

~~oOo~~

 _This story was written for the Tricky Raven 3rd Annual Author/Artist Silent Auction. LuvinJ was our winning bidder. She wanted us to write her a story set in New Moon and here is her story prompt to us:_

 _When Bella went with Alice to rescue Edward, Renee was killed in an accident rushing to the airport to come to Forks to look for Bella when she took off to Italy. With immense guilt, Bella flies back, no interfering with Edward, and she cuts off the Cullens._

 _She flies down to Florida to pick up her mom's things and to drive her car and belongings back to Forks. She asks Jake to come with... (life is short. Her mom's death proves it and also life and family matters) and ends with them making love at a hotel the last night outside of Forks with promises of a new life together._

* * *

 ** _LuvinJ, we hope we captured well what you wanted to have in this story, we are truly hoping that we did you justice. Thank you for putting your trust in us! We love ya, girlfriend!_**

 **This fabulous Banner was created by the ever wonderful and very patient Mist! LuvinJ, we hope you'll love it as much as we do!**

 **Also, another thank you to Mist for her great pre-reading and beta skills, your comments were invaluable and appreciated. Hugs!**

 **As far as the storyline goes, we adjusted a couple of things we thought would work much better with our storyline:**

 **We got rid of imprinting.** **Imprinting is ridiculous.**

 **Bella and Jake's relationship had developed a bit more than in the books. When Alice showed up at Bella's doorstep Jake and Bella had shared a dinner date and there was no almost-kiss in Bella's kitchen, but a real kiss….**

* * *

 **Disclaimer:** All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

~~oOo~~

Jake kicked, slammed and pounded the first thing that came across his way. Guess his bike was history now-as well as a few large trees have seen better days.

Looking down at his bloody knuckles for just an instant, he rolled his eyes and continued pounding and cursing in frustration. He just could not believe she had gone off to Italy to save that fucking leech.

They had just shared their first real kiss in her kitchen last night. Her tiny body molding into his as she bravely took his mouth, reached her arms around his neck and buried her fists in his hair. Her declaration that she was going to prove to him that she cared very much and that she was going to show him right now, had taking him by surprise but he would have never told her as much.

He thought about how their tongues had been dancing with each other's, tasted each other, exploring deeper than he thought they would. Oh, her sighs and sweet moans still fresh in his mind. This was their first experience and it could not have been sweeter.

Damn, he knew that they belonged together, he was right for her, they were right for each other. Shit, he wanted to have her forever. It seemed at the time that all his wet dreams of her had come true at last. Shit, he should have known better, he thought, as he continued on his destructive path. Hope, such a big word and look where it had fucking brought him. He was kicking the shit out of his belongings and moping like a fucking loser, while she'd run off to Italy, and right into the fucking vampire kingdom. For what? Stopping a dead tick from becoming even deader?

His thoughts turned back to when he had fished her out of the ocean. He had been so frightened he thought he would lose his shit. He could not lose her dammit.

This reckless cliff jumping adventure gave her some well needed awareness of her selfishness and she finally started to think about Charlie and what it would have done to him if she had succeeded.

Gosh, she sure knew how to piss him off, he thought again. He was so through with Bella, he continued thinking, furious with himself and with her. After everything they'd shared, the very same day she's promised him to stop acting rash and selfish she'd actually gone with this crazy pixy without a second thought. What was he? A damn pushover? Her fucking lap dog that came running wagging his tail as soon she deemed him to be good enough for her? He snorted a sarcastic laughter as he grasped the irony of that thought.

This was it! He wasn't going to play along any longer.

~oOo~

The wolf that shared his mind and body grumbled in discontentment. It couldn't comprehend his teenage boy's train of thoughts.

Things were that much simpler for the wolf. It knew what it wanted and it knew that the spirits had chosen Isabella Swan for himself. It didn't care if there was a treaty or not. It would have just killed the leech on sight if it were up to him and be done with it. Would have saved them all a lot of trouble.

This girl was some trouble, yes, on this the wolf agreed with his human. But then, she was worth it. The wolf had and would never back down from trouble, especially when it came to her. Somehow trouble just heightened the thrill and made them want her even more, like it was with a good hunt, the wolf mused.

The boy still had some growing up to do, but mature he would soon enough, he was sure of it. The wolf sensed it, instinctively knew this boy would grow into a proud and strong warrior and Alpha like each of the wolf's warriors before him.

So for now the wolf remained silent.

~oOo~

Bella was so nervous she kept biting her nails. Her stomach was clenching just as nervously. Looking out of the window was making everything just worse. It made her aware how she was going further and further away from home, leaving behind a terribly worried father and... _Jake_.

It was awkward sitting beside Alice after all this time, she just now realized that something had changed. Also, Alice had left her as well, not only Edward, and she had acted pretty strange ever since she showed up at Charlie's house. Her eyes had glazed over two hours ago, and Bella had asked her frantically if it was Edward. If they were too late already. She had said no, but Alice still kept staring at her strangely. Alice was weirding Bella out, and they still had one more hour to go until their landing in Firenze.

The long flight gave Bella time to think. Too much time to think, because she started to realize that she might have made a huge mistake. This thought had settled into the pit of her stomach and she could not shake it, the further she got away from home the more uncomfortable she felt. How was it her business anyway now to go after Edward and try to save him? He had left her after all. He had told her he didn't love her anymore. She was making a fool out of herself again, and she thought that she was over that now.

How did she end up here and how did it happen so fast? One minute she had been kissing Jake, and she had enjoyed it much more than she thought possible. His heat, the softness of his tongue and his taste was intoxicating. She had been ready to finally give them a chance, then the phone rang which Jake had answered and then came Alice telling her that Edward was about to kill himself.

Had she lost all of her common sense now?

How could she be so stupid agreeing to follow Alice right into Volterra? So yeah, she was still hung up on Edward, clinging to the memories and feelings of her first love. But really? Going there could easily end up with her getting killed and what for?

Now that she had time to think she also realized that she should call her father right after they had landed. How could she have run off so quickly without a thought of the people who really loved and cared about her? Charlie would be so worried by now. And her mom, she would need to call her mom too and tell her that she was okay and would come back soon.

 _Jacob._

Bella groaned, remembering the look on his face when she drove off. He had been so disappointed, so angry, so... _hurt_ when she had ignored his plea to stay. He had worked so hard trying to help her get better, and she'd simply run off after her ex. She had tossed Jake aside like yesterday's news. Had done no better than Edward to be honest. _Way to ruin a friendship, Bella Swan._

Guilt was making it hard to breathe all of the sudden. The sinking feeling in her stomach was getting worse, heightening the sense of impending doom. She had acted irrationally and wasn't she just promising Jake yesterday after this terrible cliff jumping scare that she would change? That she was done being selfish and would think about people who truly loved her?

No! She couldn't go with Alice. She needed to get back home!

She should let Alice do the saving thing. Alice would be faster without her anyway and Edward could read his sister's mind and see that she wasn't dead. No need for her to go-

"Bella?" Alice asked imploringly. She touched her hand and looked at her with huge, concerned eyes. Her hand felt unnatural, being that icy cold and hard as stone.

"We need to save Edward. You know that, right?" Alice stared at her with what seemed like a commanding and rude fashion. Her unblinking eyes were creepy in a way Bella had never been aware of before. Was spending so much time with Jacob finally rubbing off on her?

However, Bella found herself nodding in agreement with Alice's insistence. Yes, it was imperative that they went after Edward and stopped him from killing himself.

~oOo~

As soon as the plane landed, Alice took her arm rather roughly and dragged her to the exit. "We need to hurry Bella. There is no time to wait. Edward needs us," she called out.

Bella felt the buzzing of her phone in her Jeans pocket and pulled it out, stopping Alice this time dead in her track.

"No, Bella, we don't have time for calls right now," Alice urged her on.

Her phone started ringing again and she saw Charlie's number.

"I have to take this, Alice! It's Charlie!" Bella insisted, shrugging out of Alice's hold, or rather trying to since Alice held on much too tightly. "You're hurting me, Alice!"

Bella hit the answer button while struggling in Alice's hard grip. Alice finally let go of her arm as Bella listened to the news, which changed her world forever.

~oOo~

She sat back on an airplane heading to Jacksonville, hoping, no praying that time was on her side.

She had left Alice to her own devices. Saving Edward from his own stupidity wasn't her concern any longer. She had more important things to consider now.

Charlie had been very quiet on the phone at first, then started crying, and the words he quietly spoke shattered her into a million pieces. She could not even reply in any coherent manner. In fact she suddenly could no longer breathe.

How could this be? Why did this happen? Not her mom, oh please not her mother. Panic settling in and a scream build in her throat.

Her mom had been fatally injured in an terrible car accident when she had been rushing to the airport to fly out to Forks. She had been speeding in Phil's brand new Mustang and lost control over the car.

The sobs came on hot and furious as the realization of what Charlie had said registered in her brain. Her mom was no more.

' _Your mom was killed instantly, Bella. She felt no pain_.' His words were still ringing in her ears. She would never be able to forget them.

It only took one look at Alice's face right then and there, and Bella had realized that Alice had _seen_ what had happened to her mom. She had known for a while and hadn't bothered telling her. She had preferred keeping Bella in the dark and dragging her towards Volterra. She'd even tried to convince Bella by dazzling her.

"How dare you, Alice? How could you... Leave and never ever come back!" Bella had screamed at her. "We are done here! Do not ever dare to contact me or my family again! None of you! I mean I am done with the Cullens."

Shocked, angry and feeling desperate she knew that she needed to fly back home right away. She left Alice standing where she was and rushed towards the ticket counter.

"Char-, Dad, I'm in Italy", she frantically spoke in the phone again, as fear was gripping at her heart. She started to feel nauseated. She really needed to get to her mom somehow and very quickly. "Can you book me a flight to Jacksonville? I need to be with mom now, please, Dad!"

Twenty minutes later she was lucky to board a flight back home, thanks to Charlie's quick acting and getting her a ticket on an emergency basis.

Sitting in her seat now, she was overwhelmed and exhausted. She felt like crying, but the tears wouldn't come and the big lump in her throat hurt as much as her heart. What had she done? Her mom was killed in an car accident while she ran off like that to Italy... No, it simply couldn't be true. She had to be ok. She just had to be... She couldn't be dead and gone?! The guilt Bella felt, was tremendous.

She had lost her mother, and it was because of her stupidity and recklessness. She could never speak or hug to her mom again and tell her how sorry she was. The pain surrounding her heart felt unbearable.

What now? How was she supposed to live with the knowledge that she was the reason her mom got killed. How could she ever look Charlie in the eyes. She was without a doubt a terrible and selfish person.

Charlie had tried to calm her and told her to fly straight away to Jacksonville to help Phil with all the arrangements.

What does she need to do? Where should she go to the hospital or the mortuary?

Charlie had told her that Phil told him that Renee insisted on coming out to Forks as soon as Charlie had told her what had happen. According to Phil, she would not listen to any reason and tossed some items into a bag and left to the Airport with his car.

Phil had called him yesterday, and explained what had occurred. Word had spread like wildfire, everyone knew except HER! Well, she had to ran off to save a lost cause, and could not be with Charlie when she was damn sure, he had needed her when such tragic news came from Jacksonville. But then, if she had never left Forks, Charlie would have never received such news. What had she done...

Suddenly, she felt deeply ashamed of herself. She failed her own family and for what?!

How could she do such a thing to her family and... her thoughts shifted toward Jake... How could she run away from Jacob like this?!

Jake had been such a genuine friend and she knew without a doubt that he had truly her best in mind. She missed his comforting arms around her right this moment.

~oOo~

She could not stay at her mom's house. She preferred to check into a small B&B down the street. She needed to call Jake. Quickly she dialed his number.

She had all night to think about everything and made the decision that she wanted and needed Jake with her. She would beg him if she had to.

She knew without a doubt that she'd hurt him yet again and she must try to make him understand how truly sorry she was. She so needed her friend to deal with what she knew was coming.

Gruffly, Jacob answered the phone on the third ring, asking her first thing if she was ok and he wanted to know if she was alone or if this leech was with her.

"I'm alone, Jake," she said while she started to pace her small room.

"I'm so sorry about your mom, Bells," Jacob spoke, his voice sounding worried through the speaker. "Where are you?"

"I'm at a B&B. I couldn't stay at my mom's house without her being there..." Without warning hot tears suddenly burned in her eyes.

"I know, honey, but you have to be strong now for your mom's sake," Jacob said, his voice firm but patient and soothing at the same time. It was exactly what she needed. "Do you have the address where you need to go this morning?"

"I am gonna call your dad and check how he is holding up. He's been out of his mind worrying," Jacob reasoned.

Tears filled her eyes again and Bella cried only harder at his words. "I will never forgive myself, Jake, for leaving the way I did. How could I do that to him... to you... to all of you?"

"We'll talk about this later, Bella. Taking care of your mom's affairs right now it's more important than anything else at the moment."

"I know, and Phil has already made funeral arrangements, but he wants me to go through her things."

Bella heard voices in the background of Jacob's phone. "Who is there, Jake? Is it my dad?"

"No, it's Sam and Old Quil. We're going to arrange Harry's funeral too..." Now Jacob sounded really sad. He sighed, and it brought on even more of Bella's tears. "I gotta go, Bella. I'll call your dad now and let me know about your mom. I'll be here for you."

They ended the call after Bella had promised that she will call her father again and then call Jake back in a couple of hours.

~oOo~

When Charlie Swan got out of his cruiser in front of the Black's house, his feet dragged and he felt weary. They were about to bury Harry Clearwater this afternoon, one of his closest friends throughout all those years.

Across the country, he knew, funeral arrangements were made for the love of his life and former wife.

Losing both Harry and Renee and having his only daughter run away once again had sucked all energy out of him.

He should have known that with the Cullen girl back in Forks, trouble was looming. He'd seen the hopeful eyes of his daughter whilst praying that this Edwin guy would stay far, far, away. Had he known that Alice Cullen would drag his Bella off to Italy, he would have never allowed her to stay over at his house, let alone let her spend any time with Bella.

When he came home last night, Jacob had been sitting on his porch, looking crushed and beyond angry. He'd barely been able to inform him that Bella ran off with Alice Cullen, before he had stormed off into the woods. Normally, he would have gone after Billy's kid, but he'd been too concerned about Bella, and the Quileute boys had practically grown up in the forest and they knew how to help themselves.

So he had called his ex-wife instead and talked to her. She knew her daughter and he desperately needed to vent just a little. He had been very upset with Bella's latest stunt. Renee had insisted to come to Forks and wait for her return. She had planned on talking some sense into their daughter as soon as this ex-boyfriend of hers would have brought her back home, and he's better bring her home, she had said.

Maybe it would have been wiser not to call Renee. _No Shit,_ he thought, he should have remembered that she'd always overreacted a great deal. How was he supposed to know that Renee would be so rash and now he had to explain this to Bella, he kept on thinking.

He grabbed his keys and drove to LaPush. There was something he needed to discuss with Billy.

"Billy?" He called when he entered the Black's house. "I need to talk to you about something. Do you think I could borrow your boy to help out my Bells?"

Billy wheeled himself into the entryway. "Depends, Charlie. Jacob is still very upset about your daughter's disappearing act. What do want him to do for Bella?" Billy asked protectively while leading his friend into the kitchen.

"Guess, I need to ask your boy too, but Phil gave Renee's car to Bella and she'll need to drive it here." Charlie rubbed his face tiredly as he plopped down into a kitchen chair. "I really don't want her driving on her own. I can't go to come back with he with that Biers kid missing and his parents breathing down my neck."

"You want Jake to fly out to Florida and let them drive back here?" Billy pulled two cans of beer out of the fridge and placed it in front of them. "Can't pull him out of school for that long."

"I know, Billy, but your boy has been so good for my daughter, and she could really need her best friend right now. She feels so darn guilty about her mom's death. I'm afraid that she might relapse to her zombie days..."

Billy agreed that Jake needed to be with her for more than just one reason, but he put on a show for Charlie at first, he did not want to make it that easy for Charlie either, especially since he did not know about certain worries Billy had. After all, there was still a chance that one of those Cullen leeches showed up and he would not have that, but how could he tell Charlie without giving away too much?

This is not the first time that he hated how he was forced to lie to his best friend, and he knew if Charlie was ever to find out they'd been lying to him all those years, even when it involved his daughter, there would be hell to pay.

~oOo~

"If the situation wasn't so serious, I wouldn't go down to Jacksonville," he'd mused defiantly to his dad after Charlie had left. "I begged her to stay and she left me for that leech anyway."

"I don't think that right now is the moment to hold on to grudges, son," his father had said, helping him sort through his feelings. "Look, I'll take care of the school business for you. I'll talk to the principal, but you gonna have to work twice as hard when you get back, you hear me, son?"

"I know that, Dad and I will. I do want to be there for her." Jacob struggled with feeling guilty for still being upset with what Bella did to him while her mom had just been killed.

"Yes, Bella needs you right now. You need to get over yourself and man up, Jacob," his father had said to him. "You know how it was for you when your mom died. You can help her through this better than anyone."

"I know that too, Dad," Jake spoke, feeling a deep sense of sadness. He did indeed know very well what it was like. "I know that she needs me right now, and I need to protect her as well it's just...I just feel horrified that she left me like this."

"Son, you went through a lot but, wait to talk to her, and don't make your own conclusions quite yet. Do you really know why she left?" This gave Jake something to think about. He knew that he was going, there was no other way, plus he needed to see her very badly.

"Tomorrow morning is Harry's funeral. After that I am leaving for Jacksonville," Jake had said with conviction.

"Will you be alright without me, Dad?" Jacob frowned. His father got along quite well on his own for one day or two, but Jacob hadn't left for more than two days in a row. The trip from Florida back to La Push would take much longer. Who would help his dad with his daily activities? Shit, he also still needed to talk to Sam. When he told his father, Billy had informed him that he already gave Sam the heads-up, but Sam expected him to come see him ASAP in any case.

"OK, I will go over there, but first things first. Normally I'd just ask Sue to take care you, but not this time.." Jacob blurted out. "I will ask Embry or Sam..."

"Hold your horses, son." Billy chuckled. "I'll be alright without you for a while. Besides, Charlie owes me one for letting you go on this trip. Can't wait to see his face when I ask him to give me a sponge bath." Again, Billy laughed, but Jacob noticed his father's sorrow over losing his lifelong friend. Everyone missed Harry Clearwater a great deal.

In the end, Jacob's need to see Bella and help her through these hard times was stronger than the worry he felt for his father. His wolf might have had something to do with it.

~oOo~

Bella got a message on her phone. It read; "Got to Edward in time. Alice"

Bella typed back a curt; "Fine."

Her phone vibrated with a new message coming in. "I'm truly sorry."

Bella deleted the message and blocked Alice from ever contacting her again.

~oOo~

Jake had called Bella from the Airport in Seattle that he was on his way to be with her.

As soon as she heard the news, relief had flushed through her and there was nobody else she would want to be with right now.

Less than fifteen hours later, Jake sat across from her in her motel room, studying her face quietly.

After her conversation with Charlie, Bella felt indeed a little better. Oh, he was mad with her, no question, but the death of her mom out-weighed his anger over her disappearing act. They would deal with that later, he had promised.

Charlie had agreed to help Bella by getting Jake there. He did not want her alone right now either and he could not make the trip himself. Charlie had booked a last minute fare for Jacob to Jacksonville.

~oOo~

She continued to go through her mom's belongings, sorting out what she'd want to keep and what she wanted to give away. She had spent several hours crying and realizing how short life truly was. Too short to waste it away so foolishly. She started to recognize how precious and fragile life is. Why was it so hard to see that before, she had mused in between sobs.

She had felt alone, so utterly alone doing this daunting task, yet, this alone time was needed. She needed to sort through her mind as well. It was really amazing, she mused, how much had changed in such a short time. She began to look at several past events in her life in a different way.

Edward had slowly but surely faded into the background. She no longer felt that she depended on him or needed him, much less that she wanted to become a vampire.

This realization stopped her effectively in her track. She never thought this possible, after months and months of mourning for him, but after a few more minutes of contemplating and taking stock of her feelings, she was certain of it.

She knew without a doubt, that Jacob Black, her personal sun... he had a big part of it in her change of heart. Jacob embodied life itself, and she wanted to live indeed.

What did she truly want in life? She continued musing, she had so many questions and she intended to discuss some of those with Jacob and she would spend much more time for herself figuring things out. She had many amends to make. She only hoped that the people she hurt would eventually be able to forgive her.

"Mom", she spoke quietly, "I love you so much..."

Phil was grieving in his own way by closing himself off from everyone, and she was respecting his decisions. Who was she to judge anyway? Bella felt relieved all over again that Jake had agreed to come and stay with her until they both went back to Forks together in her mom's car.

~oOo~

After several more hours of sorting through her mom's things, she finally sat down on the couch for a while, drinking the tea she had brewed a few moments ago. She could not make herself eat anything yet, but the herbal tea was soothing her insides.

In her lap sat a small shoe box which held dozens of pictures. She quickly rifled through the box. Right now it was too painful to really have a look at all the pictures. Pictures of herself as a baby and toddler. Pictures of her father holding her infant self. Pictures of her mom and dad together, happy, smiling, enjoying life.

Underneath those pictures Bella found a stack of pictures with a black ribbon tied around it. She carefully opened the ribbon and the pictures she found took her breath away. She never knew, but obviously her mom had been very good friends with Sarah Black before she had left Charlie and Forks. Those pictures were labeled: Fun at First Beach with Sarah, Summer 1985, shopping trip to PA with Sarah and Sue, March, 1986, Billy and Sarah's wedding, 1985.

Then there was a letter, and when she started to read, big mournful tears fell down Bella's face. It was a letter from Sarah asking Renee why she had left without even saying goodbye to her and without waiting for Sarah's new baby to be born. From the envelope Bella pulled three more pictures, all of them showing baby Jacob in his mother's arms.

As sad as the pictures and the letter were making her, Bella knew she had found a treasure and that Jacob would be very happy when she would give those pictures and even the letter to him.

For now, she put the box away. There would be a time for those pictures, but not right now.

She would pick up Jake from the airport in another hour, and her stomach ached up a little just thinking about him. She felt pretty bad too all over again for running off with Alice.

Purposefully, she forced herself to stop thinking about it right now and rushed into the bathroom to take a look in the mirror. Her face was blotchy and her hair a mess. Quickly she splashed cold water on her face and brushed her hair with long fierce strokes. That should do it, she thought as she slipped into her shoes, took her purse and car keys.

Thirty minutes later, Jake walked out of the gate, looking both mad and relieved to see her. Cautiously he embraced her, not really knowing how to react. He'd seen the pain and sorrow all over her face, the loss of her mom had to have rocked her to the core.

He could not help himself, mad or not, this girl desperately needed him right now and he would be the shoulder to lean on for her no matter what.

Bella melted into him, buried her face deeply in the side of his neck and silently cried like a baby. They stood there for a long time, until he noticed that the crowed was already thinning out.

"Thank you for coming, Jake. I owe you for this and I know I owe you a whole lot more by now." She sat there looking at him with red rimmed eyes from crying.

Jake did not respond right away. He did not know how right this moment. He was tired, drained and starving. The recent events were nagging at him.

"Bells, I need to get my bag. Come on, baby. Let's go," he spoke softly and Bella only nodded in agreement.

Bella handed him the car keys as soon as they reached the parking garage so he could drive them back to Renee's place.

They sat in the kitchen together and Jake ate the sandwiches that Bella had made for him.

"What's new?" Bella asked tiredly. She felt mostly numb still, yet she was for some crazy reason overly aware of him at the same time. She knew that he was mad, everything about him radiated irritation and sadness, but she also saw sorrow in his eyes.

"Leah killed the redhead", Jake answered her question. I guess the leech didn't expect her to burst out of her skin right at the funeral." Jacob laughed humorlessly. "Stupid bitch tried to sneak up on us trying to catch us unawares."

"Bad thing is, Charlie knows now. He knows everything. Expect to be grounded for life when you get home, Bella."

Jake went on and talked for another ten minutes, but the elephant in the room grew larger by the minute. He was still mad at her and she did not blame him one bit.

"How long do you think you need to stay here to sort things out Bells? The Service will be tomorrow afternoon right?" Jake inquired. She shook her head in confirmation. "It's at 11:00am" she simply stated.

"Sam is giving me no longer than a week to 12 days tops; I just want you to know that." Jake had put his arm around her a few moments ago, and she was not shivering as much now and she simply leaned her head on his strong shoulder, closed her eyes and nodded in acknowledgement.

"Okay, Jake! I am really glad that you are here with me." Her head turned upward as she was trying to gauge his mood. "So you have told me many times already, Bells. I am here to support you, no matter how mad I get at you sometimes. I am still always going to be there for you. Remember my promise, honey?"

And remember she did, which only made her feel worse again. He is a much better friend to her than she ever was to him. She was hoping to change that. He deserved so much better.

"I know we will be driving your mom's car back," Jake interrupted her thought process. "Are you sure Phil does not want it, given that his Sportcar is totaled?"

Bella flinched, but told him that she was sure.

"I am starving, Bells. Can we please get something to eat soon?" The comment came so suddenly at the same time as his stomach loudly grumbled and Bella could not help but laugh at him.

"You just ate three sandwiches, Jake. Are you serious?"

"Okay, let's go," she said quickly before Jake was able to say anything further. "I need to leave this house for a while anyway. It's really difficult being here, Jake. I never thought I would have to deal with something like this. Life can be so cruel and I am starting to realize that it can be just gone... in a blink of an eye. It hurts so much, Jake." Bella crawled up in Jake's lap to find his warmth and comfort and his strong arms completely encompassed her small frame. Regardless of his own feeling, he was going to give her what she needed most right now, a real friend.

"We can go to the diner right across the street," she spoke into his chest. She felt secure and warm at this moment and really wanted to stay like this for the rest of the day, but after another fifteen minutes, Jake's stomach growled once more so she decided it was time to take care of him and his huge appetite. Slowly got up and walked to the bathroom to comb her hair again and wash her tear-dried face one more time as well.

"Yeah, it's good to get outside" he said as they crossed the street to _Dani's Diner_. "I also thought that we could talk about the next few days a little. It will be a long ride home and I wanted to make sure that you take care of everything here first before we hit the road."

~oOo~

Renee had left a Will which said she didn't want to be buried somewhere and she wished that her ashes should be scattered into the ocean or on a beautiful meadow.

The next morning, everything that Bella wanted to keep of Renee's things were stored away or stacked in Renee's car.

Phil, Bella and Jacob went to the mortuary to pick up her urn. The body had already been cremated, and the ashes were placed in a beautiful white ceramic container.

Bella's legs gave out under her when Phil put the white urn in her hands, but Jacob wrapped his arms around her quickly for support and was holding her upright.

"We will find a good place for your mom," Jacob said to her. When she looked up at him, Bella saw through her own tears that he was crying too. The pain was almost unbearable, but Bella was glad in any case to hold her mom's urn close to her heart.

Without a doubt, she would have never been able to go through any of this without Jacob's support. He has been her rock; he kept holding her up and constantly spoke reassuring words into her ear. She also could clearly see that he was in tremendous pain himself, remembering all too clear the loss of his own mom.

Slowly all three of them left the mortuary and walked into the sunshine. The warmth immediately encased them and it felt good. A group of kids skitted by laughing loudly at something unknown to them and it reminded them how carefree life used to be for them. Both Bella and Jacob were forced to grow up too fast and Bella reminded herself that she brought on lots of heartache to herself.

For her mom's sake, she vowed to slow down, enjoy life and appreciate the people who she loved dearly, and she would be a better friend to Jacob, that she was sure off.

They reached the car holding each other's hands and placed the urn on the backseat of the car, Phil walked behind them, as he started joking that they better buckle the urn in good so that Renee won't fall off the seat! They all had to laugh a little through their tears, and were super careful buckling Renee in.

They said their goodbyes and left for their long road trip back to Forks.

~oOo~


	2. Chapter 2

**The Road To Happiness**

Part II

* * *

 **Disclaimer:** All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

~~oOo~~

They headed down the I-475 N heading into Georgia.

They had driven several hours already, having left Jacksonville before dawn that morning.

Charlie Swan had given Jacob some money since it was his daughter Jacob is helping.

He also transferred enough money into Bella's account to cover the basic travel expenses like gas, night stays and costs for food for the two of them.

Billy had given Jake all the money he could scrape together, since he wouldn't send his son on a journey without some money in his pockets. Jake didn't want to accept it first, but he basically bullied him to take it anyway. For his own sanity, he had told Jake.

Bella and Jake had also received some travel money from Phil, he wanted to contribute as well and Bella knew any extra emergency funds would really be helpful. One never knows what could happen on the road. She had thanked him and gave him a peck on the cheek when she said goodbye.

Both felt uncomfortable about the amount of money their fathers had spent on them, and they decided to keep their travel expenses as low as possible.

However, Bella had to buy some clothes. She'd come to Jacksonville with nothing more than she'd been wearing and a couple of panties, socks and shirts she had stuffed into her backpack before Alice had dragged her into her car.

They stopped at a Walmart where Bella bought enough clothes for herself to last through their trip.

~oOo~

The radio hummed an upbeat tune and Bella leaned over to turn it down. "Not feeling very happy right now," she declared.

"I know what it feels like losing your mother first hand, Bella. I'm really sorry about that, you know that right?" he watched her nod her head again.

"I have to tell you, I'm not really happy myself. I mean, damn, look at the last few days, I don't even know what happened so fast here. We were getting along so well, we were getting so much closer, and I thought that you were getting much better Bella.

Next thing I know….Gee, Bella, we just had some dinner, and it was clear that you felt bad for the scare you had caused all of us with this stupid cliff jump. And then there was this ki...kiss."

Jake cleared his throat, watching her reaction closely. "It was all I could think about, Bells, but you just went up and took off with that pixie leech. What were you thinking?"

Bella felt embarrassment coloring her cheeks. She did not feel proud of her actions at all. "Honestly Jake," she slowly said. "I didn't want that Edward hurt himself or maybe worse... because of me. I only realized on my way there, when I was sitting next to Alice, I felt something different.

Something had changed and I was trying to figure out what exactly it was. All I knew for sure was that I kept thinking about Charlie and you, Jake. I hated knowing that I hurt you so much when I left.

Then I started to realize that I had made a huge mistake... and now... my mom is dead because of me!" Bella screamed her last words and simply broke down crying.

Jake slammed his foot on the brakes and pulled over immediately. He said nothing at first, only taking her into his arms and swaying her gently.

Perhaps it was still too early to confront Bella with her disappearing act, but it hurt him knowing that she felt so responsible about her moms accident.

"Come here, honey! Go ahead and let it out. You can scream, and even punch me. I swear, whatever it may be for you to feel better, just do it!" He handed her some napkins he had located in the glove compartment.

"I don't want to punch you. Why should I want to punch you?" Bella asked through her tears.

Jake shrugged. "I dunno..." he answered. "I saw girls do that on TV..."

Bella looked at him incredulously. "And you believe that's true, Jake?"

"Hey, what would I know? It's not that I have that many girls around me. Becca and Rach left five years ago...and I guess I might have been too young to remember what makes them tick. I'm just glad that you have stuck around me during the last few months, else I would be totally screwed in front of the guys' eyes." His eyes sparkled in amusement now. "But really, it's just my dad and I, Bells...as you know "

Slowly, Bella's tears subsided. Even-though she felt exhausted mentally and physically, she looked at Jake with astonishment. Jake was so pure and beautiful and he was incredibly strong, and he has always been just being himself. He endured a lot growing up without a mom. Yet he stayed positive and dealt with life as it came.

How could she not see that more clearly before? He deserved at least honesty and she's not been a very good friend. Well, if she was honest, she did see it now. Without his support and his ever present positivity, she would have never been able to get out of this desperate depression. She had been selfish, worrying about herself and wallowing in her own pain and loss after Edward tossed her aside.

She had preferred to feel sorry about herself for months instead of snapping out of it at some point and just go on with her life. People separated all the time, and while it was painful and you were miserable about it, it was no reason to completely go Zombie and hurt the people that were trying to help you with that behavior. But Jacob's constant companionship and happy nature had not gone unnoticed either. She had developed deeper feelings for him then already. Stubbornness had prevented her for acknowledging it.

Jake never made her feel inadequate like Edward had. Jake made that hole in her stomach shrink. Fact was, the day that he fished her out of the ocean had opened her eyes. What she saw in Jake's face was pure fear, hurt, pain, relief that she's survived this stupid ordeal and she saw love. Yes, he deeply loves her.

How could she look away from that? He wanted her, and she had been stupid for the longest time.

She was starting to see herself in a new light. It hurt knowing that she had disappointed him so badly. What kind of friend was she, she asked herself again.

Jacob pressed her hand reassuringly, noticing the frown lines on her forehead. "It'll be alright. You need to give it time. You'll see, it will get easier," he said totally oblivious of her thoughts about him.

"I really want to be there for you," he continued. "Every step of the way. Bella, do you want me to?" His eyes looked somber into her very large brown doe eyes.

She saw fear and insecurity written on his face. She could read him so well. She gave him a nod and a small smile.

He squeezed her hand gently in return.

"We are about 10 miles outside of Atlanta, honey," he informed her. "We will stop there and rest. I'm gonna get us something to eat and we will talk a little. Does that sound okay, Bells?"

"Sounds good, Jake," Bella said quietly.

As soon as they arrived in Atlanta, Jake was on the look out for a market to get some snacks and drinks for the road. He also planned on parking somewhere quiet, so they could talk some.

They wanted to drive several more hours after they had eaten and talked a little and then look for a motel to stay the night. Both needed to call their dads to check in and let them know their location, as they had promised they would.

Jake found a Burger joint and drove right into their drive-through to order some burgers and fries for them both and since he also noticed a nice little park right across the street they could sit on a bench there, eat and talk.

Bella ate slowly, dipping her fries over and over in the ketchup, while Jake devoured his food. "Bella, you need to eat something, quit picking around and eat your burger, or else I will!" Jake winked at her.

"You know, Bells. I do know how hard it is dealing with so much all at once, but you need to keep yourself together and healthy. Charlie will need you when you get back home...and so do I."

Bella's sad huge eyes were getting to him. Her tears were still visible and she was way too pale even for her.

"OK, look," Jake said after a few quiet minutes of contemplating. "Let's not talk about anything at all today. Let's just take a look at the route we should be taking and maybe we can even stop somewhere nice for some sightseeing for a little while in a couple of days. What do you think, honey? Would you like that?"

"I really don't see myself wanting to go sightseeing I just rather go straight home." He looked at her all disappointed so she retracted quickly. "Jake, if you really want too, I will go with you," Bella replied "Now let's see this map and check our route, else we will never get wherever it is we are going next.

~oOo~

Jacob felt excited when he thought about the motel stay, as they drove into Nashville. They had already agreed earlier on sharing a room. For one, to save money, and second because it deemed safer to Jake. He hadn't smelt any vampire traces but you could never be sure and Bella was a danger magnet, plus he was not planning on leaving her out of sight for very long, and a whole night was way too long.

He had to smile to himself a little when he thought about Charlie's stern look and clear warning about no funny business with his daughter. But Jacob knew that if things would develop in that direction there was nothing Charlie could really do about it. Plus, he felt pretty sure that Charlie liked him a great deal.

Later that evening, they checked in at a Motel 6, it seemed like a decent enough place She didn't want to be alone and she trusted that Jake would keep her safe and warm.

Momentarily there was this little awkward moment when they looked at the king sized bed in the middle of the room and Jacob's wide grin did not help the situation either. "Yeah baby, this bed will give us lots of room to wrestle around, Bells", he said and wiggled his eyebrows again.

Bella felt heat creeping up in her neck. Why did she feel embarrassment all of a sudden she wondered. "Jake, you better cut it out before I change my mind and get my own room" she quickly announced.

"Okay, okay, Bells...I can sleep on the floor. I really don't mind," Jake offered, looking pathetically bumped.

"Don't be silly, Jake. You can't drive all day long and then sleep on the floor. We can share this bed. It's big enough for the two of us." Bella went around and sat down on the side of the bed which faced the window.

"Tomorrow, I will drive my share of this trip as well, I think it'll be good for me to concentrate on the road, gives me something to do you know? and you can study the map and think about a place you would like to stop at so bad".

"Well, I'll let you drive for a little while Bells, else we may need three weeks to get back home...hmmm on the other side…"

"Ugg Jake!", you don't give up do you?"

"Never Bells and don't forget that". He smiled brightly at her now and there was no way that she could have resisted not smiling back at him. He just always made her feel so good and she was glad that he was here with her.

"I'm going to call my dad and let him know that we found a place to stay." She wiggled her phone at him, "and you should do the same. I am sure Billy would like to hear from you."

"Okay, but I want to quickly phase and check in with Sam. I saw this little patch of woods right across the street. Will you be alright for a while?, I won't be long honey".

"No, I'll be good, go and do what you need to do Jake, but please be careful".

"Sure...sure…"

The night had been interesting. Even though the bed was huge, he would find Bella pressed against his body most of the time. She slept restlessly and only relaxed when he wrapped his arms around her. Naturally, he had relished in this feeling. He had wanted to lie close to her since he realized they would be sleeping in the same room, but knew it was way too early to even think about it. Now she snuggled closer all on her own. He couldn't lie, he felt pretty smug about it.

He watched her and enjoyed the feeling of her slim frame. Her hands roamed his chest, searching his heat. She had one of her legs wrapped around his hip. Damn this was hot!

More than once he had to shift away from her a little, to put some space between them. His body's reaction to her was causing him some uncomfortable pressure waaaaay down there. He tried to squeeze his manhood into submission and mentally berated it to shut the hell up several times. Damn hormones!

He finally dozed off in the wee morning hours, and woke suddenly when he could not feel her in bed any longer.

"It's about time that you wake up, you sleepy head. I've been waiting for almost an hour already," she said as she stared at him, sitting on the chair by the TV. "We should hit the road soon." She looked refreshed and ready to go.

Jake scrambled up, hiding his morning wood behind his shirt and shorts he held in front of him. He hurried into the bathroom to take a quick shower.

The shower felt good on his tired body. If only his 'friend' would be as tired right now. It would save him from the need to quickly jerk off. Thank goodness it only took a few moments. Bella's scent still lingered in the bathroom, and he just needed a little imagination to fantasize about how she'd look taking a shower. He exploded as soon as his hand closed around his dick.

After his shower, he felt famished. They picked up breakfast muffins, hot cocoa and cinnamon buns from the bakery across the street and took a couple more snacks with them. They planned on having a nice dinner later on.

~oOo~

Bella drove steady and quiet for a long time, when they heard his stomach growling.

"Okay, Bells, we should take a break real soon and get some food, there is no way I can wait until dinner. We didn't eat all day, man," he complained, as his stomach growled louder. Bella pointed to all the wrappers Jake had littered throughout the car from all sorts junk food items, and soda cans.

He only smiled. "I'm starving, Bells, come on."

"Well, it seems like a good idea to stop, get gas and food. The sign just read Columbia. Guess, that'll be a good place to take a break," she decided and Jake felt relieved to get out of the car to stretch his long legs. The truck stop looked decent enough and there was a shopping plaza as well. They could get some more snacks and drinks.

He had let her be most of the day, she needed some thinking time he could tell and he got a chance to doze off a little here and there.

But he was ready for some food and some conversations now.

Time to make a plan when they would drive into South Dakota and Montana. He wanted to visit Badlands National Park in South Dakota and definitely Yellowstone Park in Montana.

~oOo~

They found a motel right outside of St. Joseph, Missouri, where they stayed the night.

It was a long day, driving definitely took its toll. Bella didn't want to talk that much mostly she needed time to think, so she had stated. He had no problem with that, since he needed some time to think about lots of things himself.

That night, Bella cried in her sleep. She only calmed down when Jake took her silently in his arms and gently rocked her.

She missed her mom so much.

~oOo~

The next day, Bella seemed much better and they came across a fancy white villa as they drove through a charming town. Two expensive looking cars were parked in the driveway.

"The Cullen's mansion never appealed to me," Bella said out of the blue. "It was just too big and not really homey despite all the efforts Esme put into decorating and redecorating. I always felt like I'm in some kind of museum."

"It must stink in their house," Jake commented, screwing up his nose.

Bella laughed. "It smelt fine to me, but I'm only the puny human."

"Yeah, you said that!" Jake laughed at well. "And you're not puny." He squinted his eyes at her.

She swatted at him and ended up accidentally slapping the bag of chips he was holding out of his hand. Chips rained all over his seat.

Laughter erupted out of her at his shocked face.

"Oh, yeah, Bells, I give you funny," he warned as he picked up a handful of the spilled chips and tossed them on her.

He snorted with laughter by now.

"Oh you didn't just do that, Jake. Look at this mess now. I swear, I am going to make you wash my moms Jetta first thing in the morning.

"Sure, sure Bells, but you started it," he reminded her as he tugged her ponytail.

When they had quieted down, Jacob asked, "What would you want your house to look like? "

Bella was thinking for a while. "I would want a house just big enough for my family…" and a family she wanted indeed. She was now more than ever convinced that this is exactly what she always wanted. Some dark veil had been over her eyes all this time.

"A beautiful, old fashioned farmhouse kitchen with a really big oven," she continued, "a butcher block kitchen island... I dunno how it's called... this sturdy thing standing in the middle of the kitchen... Oh, and I would need a rack where I can hang my pots and pans."

"A big, well-stocked pantry too, and I would need a place where I can grow herbs and stuff..." Bella became really animated and Jacob marveled at the happy gleam in her eyes and the rosy flush covering her cheeks.

He was a little stunned right about now. He did not expect her to open up that deeply, let alone having this absolutely beautiful expression of life in her eyes.

Traffic was light now and they kept on cruising on as Bella continued talking about her dreams. "I've been thinking that I really want a regular life, I want a family...kids, I want a couple of kids at the least and I want to fill the house with laughter and happiness."

Her eyes took on a dreamy shine as her face blushed a little the kind of rosy pink he loved so much. "Oh yeah, and I want a porch with a swing, and two bathrooms so I don't need to share one with my kids.

Honestly, I don't know what I was thinking before, because having a family is the best thing in the world, I want that.

"And you, Jake? What would you want your house to be like?" She asked him after a few minutes.

"Well, damn, Bells, you seem to know exactly what you want all of a sudden. And this future seems to be a hell of a different one than you had planned not too long ago."

He held his finger up, stopping her effectively of interrupting him.

"I know, I know...you have finally seen the light and are done with leeches, and I will take some credit for that with helping you in this decision with my sunny charm. Am I right?"

He barely noticed the punch she applied to his arm, but he pretended that it hurt like crazy. Healthy laughter drifted out of the car windows as she slowed down to a halt, noticing the most beautiful sundown ever.

"Wow, Jake! Look at the sky, look at the colors!" She leaned forward and did not even notice that Jake had gotten out of the car and came around to open her door. He held his hand out, asking her to come step out with him. She did not hesitate and jumped out.

He stepped behind her, her back was leaning against Jake's broad chest, his arms encompassing her frame as she leaned her head back onto his shoulders. She felt the warmth radiating off him and seeping right into her body and soul. It felt so right and the scene before them simply was perfect.

The land had opened up on either side of the two-lane road to big flat fields. Behind the field on the right side were a thick tree line and a couple of farmhouses, basking in the reddish golden glow of the setting sun.

In the distance, they heard dogs yipping then. She jumped a little as the sudden bark sounds seemed to have gotten closer. She turned around to hide her face into Jake's chest, when she suddenly laughed at her own reaction.

After all, she had her very own wolf with her. Why would she get jumpy at some ordinary dogs playing... Wait what? Her very own wolf... she mused as a thought came to mind.

She was about to voice her thoughts when she noticed Jake's joyful face, looking upon a pair of gorgeous German Shepherds.

They had approached them and were now in a down position observing Jake with intensity but friendly manner.

"Wow, they are beautiful, Jake. Look at how they are studying you." Bella was getting curious and enjoyed the scene in front of her.

"Are they scared of your wolf, Jake?"

"You would think that they are, but look at them. I think they are more curious than anything else."

One of the dogs yipped and jumped up. The other one followed immediately. They started a happy play with each other as one was chasing its mate across the field with happy woofing sounds.

Jacob stared at them longingly. Being confined the car all day long and having last phased over 24 hours ago, he was almost desperate to go for a good hard run.

He was not supposed to phase with the farmhouses nearby, but no-one would see him if he was careful when he joined in the dogs play, especially since he thought about running into the adjacent forest first.

Jake let out a bark that caught both dogs' attention. They came running toward him, only to stop shortly in front of him, turned around to run again, wagging their tails and pouncing, their butts up in the air, a clear invitation to play. A chase was in order, Jake thought and a good run was just what he needed.

He ran behind some thick brush and stripped his clothing, he phased on the fly and took off running after them. As soon as he caught up to them which took him no time at all, they all came to a halt, the two Shepherds sniffing Jake with excitement, not showing any signs of intimidation to his huge size.

Jake pounced once and the two beauties started bolting, looking back at Jake to make sure he would chase them, and chase them he did. Happy yipping came from the Shepherds. Jake clearly enjoyed the carefree play. There was a flurry of playful wrestle, with both dogs playfully biting at Jake and jumping up high as Jake tried to do the same.

Bella laughed and sat down in the low grass, watching Jake goof around with those dogs.

She felt at peace.

Eventually, wolf Jake trotted over to her and lay down by her side.

They decided not to drive any further today. They found a tiny motel just as they drove into South Dakota, only a few miles further down the road.

~oOo~

Again, Bella searched Jakes closeness during the night. This time she went into his arms cuddling up and she fell asleep quickly. She slept peacefully and remained snuggled into him all night long.

~oOo~

It was their fourth day on the road and yet another night with little sleep for Jake. To be honest, he enjoyed the feel of her body against his own, and he imagined her always being in his bed and part of his life.

Naturally, his body's reaction to her drove him a little crazy but what can you expect from a hormone crazed teenage shapeshifter, he thought. He would have her drive again the next day so he could snooze a little in the car.

After they had their breakfast, they took off, and after an hour driving, Jake closed his eyes again, making sure she was alright with it first.

She enjoyed the quiet for some time, and ensured him to go ahead, but then her mind started to wander.

Grief and the loss of her mom once again overwhelmed her. It was almost one week ago today that her mom was killed in that car accident.

Concentrating on the road had helped her a great deal not to get lost in the sadness, but now it hit her big time.

The long talks with Jake were a welcome distraction and she's been feeling so much closer to him too. He understood what she was going through and his compassion and love for her was endless. She understood that now. He is good for her.

Stay focused, Bella reminded herself again as she watched Jacob out of the corner of her eyes. He looked a little uncomfortable in his seat. He's just too big to find a relaxed position, she thought. His head was tilted at an odd angle. She was sure he'd wake up with a sore neck.

Then she wondered why he was so tired. She slept like baby and he seemed to be even more groggy with each new day. Was she crying in her sleep and if so, did that kept him from sleeping?

She couldn't remember having any nightmares either, especially not since sleeping next to Jake. In the mornings, she would always wake up refreshed and comfortable in Jake's arms.

"Holy Crow," Bella cried out. She was hogging his space. That must be it. Why didn't he say something when she was taking over the whole bed?

Jacob shot up in his seat, searching for danger through bleary eyes. "What's up, Bells?"

Embarrassed, Bella tucked her head between her shoulders. "Sorry, just freaked out a little about nothing. You can go back to sleeping…"

Jacob grunted, looked around once more, checking the inside of the car and checking the road, and settled back in his seat. He mumbled something that sounded like crazy Bells, but she wasn't sure.

Chewing at the inside of her cheek, Bella went back to thinking. She had been seeking to be near him, she needed to be near him more often than she would have imagined just a few weeks ago. Jake's closeness gave her comfort and he always made her feel like a real person. He truly cared.

If she was honest with herself, she had feelings for him, had them all along, and ever since that kiss in her kitchen her feelings for Jake had come to the forefront much stronger and she felt ready about giving a relationship with Jacob a real try.

Everything felt so natural when she was with him. Talking to him, sharing her grief and sorrow, leaning into him for comfort.

Taking the next step should be as easy as breathing. She needed to tell him. As she thought about it more she noticed that she was in fact ready to give them a chance. They both needed to take it slow, she was sure. They still had much to work out but it felt right to work at things with him.

What would her mom think about it if she was still alive?

Bella snorted. As if her mom had ever given a thought about what others were thinking about her. No, her mom would have told her to go with it and deal with the consequences later.

Would Charlie be mad at her when he will realize that she had gotten that close with Jake? She didn't think so actually, Charlie loved Jake and he would welcome him.

When she'd left Jake to run after Edward she knew Charlie had to be furious, he never cared about him, something felt off he would tell her often.

Edward was her first love, or at least she thought it was love. Jake was still mad about her running after him, she knew that, and with good reason. It resulted in her mom getting killed.

She sighed.

Bella realized that her thoughts were going a thousand miles and were pretty erratic.

If she had learned something about death, the death of her mother, it was that life was short and so precious.

You had to live each day as if were your last. And that is what she wanted to do from now on.

"What are you thinking so hard?" Jacob asked, pulling her out of her thoughts, which startled her momentarily.

"Geez, Jake, I thought you were sleeping," she said as she looked at his huge yawn and smiled.

"Well, I thought of you, me and about my mom," Bella answered truthfully, and went on still thinking out loud. "You know my mom always wanted to go river rafting, but never got to do it. What do you think about if we do it for her instead?"

"Definitely an option, Bells, but maybe you should stay away from wild water for a little while? I mean, just saying, honey. But if this is important to you we will do it. I'll be there to watch you." He grinned at her widely.

"But hey tell me, what were you thinking about the two of us, Bella?" he looked at her with curiosity shining in his eyes.

She slowed down the car and looked for a spot where she could stop. She thought it better not driving asking him the question she had in mind.

"Wow, that serious, Bells?" He only half way joked, but noticed the serious expression on Bella's face.

After she pulled into a rest-stop, she turned the engine off and turned to face him. "Really, Jake. I know you've been mad at me for what I did.

No, don't say anything right now, please. I was wrong to run off with Alice the way I did... No wait... It was wrong trying to save Edward. Period."

He had made it very clear that he did not want me, and I...I know now too... that we were wrong for each other, Jake. I don't feel the same for him any longer and if I am honest with myself, I haven't for a while.

"Shhhh, Jake," she said as she put her small hand over his mouth. "Please, wait and hear me out. I wanted to ask you a question…"

She stopped and took a deep breath. Her heart was racing like crazy. "Jacob...I..." Another deep breath.

"Can I ask you... to kiss me... again? Please, kiss me, Jake!" she blurted out hurriedly, and waited with baited breath for his reaction.

There was no hesitation whatsoever.

With an blink of the eye, he had pulled her into his lap, had lifted her right across the center console, and held her face between his own. He peppered small kisses over her face until his lips reached hers.

~oOo~

They found a hotel after their stop at the rest area.

They fell asleep wrapped up in each other's arms after a long time they spent kissing and talking.

~oOo~

They reached the Badlands, in South Dakota the next day in the early morning and planned on spending the day sightseeing. It was the place Jake had wanted to see, and from looking around, Bella already liked it a lot and now wanted to explore it too.

They checked in one of the cabins they had rented for the night, and then booked the night sky 'show' because according to the brochures laying out it was the most amazing thing.

They picked up food and drinks at a local little market before they parked the Jetta and started their walk up one of the hiking routes.

Bella loved the striking geologic deposits. Supposedly, it was the world's richest fossil beds, she read in one of the brochures Jake had picked up. Ancient mammals such as the rhino, horse, mammoth and saber-toothed cat once roamed here once upon a time.

"Jake, this is so awesome! Wow, I love it here. Look at those mountains. It's so beautiful".

Seeing her eyes light up in delight made it all worth it, he thought to himself feeling smug.

Jake was glad that he talked it into her, they walked hand in hand through, over and around rocks, and hills. They were amazed with the weird rock formations and their various colors. They came in brown, reddish brown, pink, yellow.

It was scorching hot combined with very high winds. It really added to the aura of this place and it lived up to its name. For miles and miles those alien looking mountains stretched out.

They took a picture of themselves and sent it to Charlie, telling him to show the picture to Billy as well.

"My dad will be so happy for me. You know, that I get to see this," Jake said. "I've never been around anywhere further than Neah Bay."

He would have loved to explore more of the area, but they could not spend too much time here, nightfall was coming on soon and they had planned on watching the night sky at an observatory location.

"Hop on," Jake finally suggested with a look at Bella's red face. She looked really tired. He moved their rucksack to the front and helped Bella to get on his back.

He tremendously enjoyed the feel of her. He felt her cheek on his back, her sweet breath, and her sweat dampening his t-shirt. He did not mind.

"Jake, did I ever tell you that you are the best?" he heard her speak softly.

Man, what is she doing to me, he thought as a smart-ass remark was about to slip over his tongue, but then he opted for "Sure... sure, honey."

It took them only 20 minutes to get back to to the rented little cabin, where they planned on spending the night, all thanks to Jake's' smart idea of carrying her. She had some time to relax and seemed all excited for the 'sky show'.

The evening had turned out better than she anticipated, she even relaxed some and allowed herself to focus on the moment. She desperately needed some time where the hurt and grief was not overwhelming her. Jake truly was the best influence on her ever.

They loved observing the sky through the telescopes. They listened to the Ranger as he pointed toward the constellations, stars, and planets.

They had noticed some people watching them and some even commented on how perfect of a couple they seemed to be.

Bella smiled up at Jake, and her eyes and mind seemed for once wide open, actually really taking him in.

Bella appreciated him more each day. They had truly enjoyed themselves and Bella was glad that he had agreed to come. Jake was slowly but surely healing her soul.

Eventually, after they had dinner together they went back to their room to get some sleep, as they had planned on a very early departure.

This site-seeing endeavour had set them back several hours in their schedule, and they still had a couple of States to cross until they reached Seattle. They were hoping to make up some of that lost time, so Jake was planning on driving tomorrow.

Bella took a shower right after Jake and took some extra time to reflect back on the day. She felt good, she was able to relax and enjoy every special moment they had shared. She would have to tell Jake.

"Thank you, Jake. I am so glad you took me here. I did not think I could enjoy myself as I much as I actually did." She looked at him with the hope that he saw how much of a difference he is making in her life.

He deserved to be loved and she started to realize that she could be easily loving him.

"Jake, it's so late, should we try to get some sleep? We could watch a little TV if you like?" But when he watched her yawning deeply, he took her hand, leading her to the bed.

"Come on Bells, let's hit the mattress, what do you think?"

~oOo~

Bella woke up to a low groan which caused her eyes to pop open. A hot jolt started to race through her body and settle in her lower stomach. But then she noticed it was coming from Jake who held her flush against his own body.

Heat spread out through her entire body, faster than she could formulate a thought or even an idea of what was happening. His strong arms wrapped around her, and his legs holding hers in between his.

She lay completely encased by his entire body.

Something hot and hard pressed into her lower back and in a slow rhythm it felt like he was bumping her over and over again.

Another throaty groan made by Jake, and this time the hairs on her neck stood up and the insides of her thighs started to dampen.

"Jake," she asked, but it came out a breathless whisper. Her T-shirt had ridden up, exposing half of her back. His body heat scorched her flesh.

It felt fantastic. She never had felt this way before. Never had been held like this. Her heart skipped a beat, as she realized that he was actually turning her on.

His hand slid down her body, gripping her hip and pulling her even closer into his body.

"Hm," he mumbled drowsily. "So… good…"

"Jake," she spoke louder and this time he woke completely.

He froze, lifting his hands from her and scooting back. "Sorry, Bells," he said, shocked with himself.

It was apparent that he was doing these things in his sleep, but it had felt so good.

For sure, she did not want him to feel embarrassed about it. She enjoyed the feeling of his body.

"Jake, please come here," she shyly whispered. "I... I want to feel you close to me again."

Jake scooted back up to her, a little embarrassed that his 'friend' was still standing to attention. Well... she said come closer again, he thought... Here you go, Bells.

He smelled her arousal and this was not helping. He moaned into her neck.

Her body once again reacted to his moan with an involuntary roll of her hip and a responding little sigh. "Can I ask you a question?"

"You can ask me anything, honey. Go ahead." He was spooning her now. His lips moved along her neck as he spoke.

"I have never have done this before, Jake..." she whispered. Her hand grabbed his thigh. Feeling those thick muscles made her belly clench. "Did you?

"Nope, only in my dreams, Bells. And only with you." He did not hesitate telling her. He wasn't embarrassed that he had no experience.

After all, he saw in his pack brothers minds a few times how it's done. Besides, he was sure his vivid dreams of her would help him with whatever was about to happen now.

"Oh," she breathed. She had trouble thinking clearly.

"Do you want me to touch you, Bells?" He pressed his erection a little harder into her and trailed his fingers down her side, until he reached her hip.

Just the thought of touching her, he had to concentrate not to cum right then and there! Gosh he was gonna blow his load at any time.

She moaned in response to his touch and shivered. "Yes."

He let one hand slide lower, trying to spread her thighs gently. The scent flooding his senses almost drove him insane.

He covered her mound with his hand. He could feel her warmth and wetness. The feeling was sensational, much better than he could have ever dreamt about.

Jake shifted, so that he could reach around her with the other arm. She lay more in his arms now. His hand found one her breasts and gently squeezed. Her breast was firm under his hand, yet soft like satin, and so different from anything he had ever touched.

Her nipple hardened into a stiff peak as he ran his thumb over it.

He was so excited, his fingers trembled.

Bella writhed against him, her bottom rubbing against his dick just the right way.

He slipped one long finger inside her panties. She was really wet and he easily glided through her folds.

"Ahh," she whimpered and grabbed his arm. Her nails dug into his skin, and he liked it so much.

He found that little something... right where he thought it should be. Through the pack mind, he had seen Paul doing all sorts of things to various girls. For once, Jake was glad Paul loved to brag about his experiences.

Oh yeah, this must be it, he thought, because when he circled around it with his fingertip, she jolted like a lightning bolt.

"Bells?" he asked.

"Don't stop, Jake." Her other hand came up and took a handful of his thick hair. She tugged at it, trying to pull him closer yet.

She lifted her chin. Their lips met. He groaned into her mouth when she opened up to him instantly.

He struggled just a little bit with kissing and touching her at the same time. He wanted to make sure that he did everything right and doing multiple things at once was interesting, a little overwhelming even, but then he just went with what felt good. Kissing, touching, moving, he soon found rhythm that worked for him, and Bella seemed to like it just as much.

He ground into her, relishing in her little noises, loving the way she clung to his arm and pressed into his hand.

"More, Jake..." she begged, and he applied a little more pressure to his touch and circled that little nub a little faster.

Bella started panting.

Jake shifted again so could move a little better. Suddenly, her hand was there, on his dick, closing around him through his boxers.

"Oh, damn..." he groaned, squeezing his eyes shut. He felt his balls tighten, his dick harden even more. There was no way he could stop coming now. He rubbed her just a tiny fraction faster and pinched her nipple, hoping she would be going with him.

Her back arched, she pressed him harder, and with a squeal, she climaxed.

"Oh, fuck!" was all he was able to say, as he exploded and spilled his hot seeds all over both of them.

They both just lay there, trying to catch their breaths for a moment.

He wrapped his arms around her, holding her close to him. He could feel her racing heart. She snuggled into his chest, tiny sensual aftershocks still running through her pelvis.

"I'm sticky," she noted. However, she felt so good, a smile spread all over her face.

"I'm sorry," Jake responded, wondering if he actually should feel sorry about coming all over her behind.

"What for? That was amazing, Jake!" She turned around, ignoring that wet feeling on her back, and kissed him again.

Eventually Jake gently backed away, leaving her wet and cold. "Let me get something for you. Maybe there is an extra towel in the bathroom. Hold on, Bells."

Jake hurried into the bathroom, unable to believe that they just did that. It was the single most fantastic thing he had ever done. Just a shame that he'd come so fast. _Uggg, damn but no wonder, every night I have been hard as a freaking rock._

He hoped that she was okay that he didn't hold out longer, but she had climaxed so fast, he thought, grinning from ear to ear. _Guess I'm not half bad after all._

~oOo~


	3. Chapter 3

**The Road To Happiness**

.

Part III

.

The next morning, both were basking in the afterglow of what had happened in the night.

They had breakfast and for once, Bella had an appetite and actually ate so much from the buffet that Jacob stared at her in disbelief.

"You did work up quite the appetite last night, Bells," he remarked chewing on a breakfast sausage.

Bella blushed bright red. "Oh, shush, Jake," she murmured, but smiled at him with sparkling eyes. "And you better stop eating now, before they throw us out. Didn't you notice when the waiter talked to their manager when you filled your plate for the fifth time?"

"Oh, I did, but I'm a growing boy." Jake laughed freely. "I need the food, you know with my fast metabolism and all… You won't want me to wither away and die, now will you?" He guffawed so loud, people were staring at them. "Besides, we'll be on the road all day long..."

After breakfast, Jake went for a quick phase and talk with Sam; to do his daily check-in. Everything was good at home so he felt good about that.

Bella packed their stuff and put it into their car. Then she went to the local market once again to stock up on snacks and drinks. They planned on driving straight through to Yellowstone National Park.

As she stashed their bags behind the backseat, her eyes fell on her mother's urn. Grief struck her and tears started to burn in her eyes.

Jake found her huddled over and clutching the urn to her chest.

Jake noticed her in the backseat, and felt right away something was wrong, quickly he was by her side and took her into his arms. Tears flowing freely now, and

He gently rocked her, knowing that was all he could do for her right now. "I'm here, honey… I'm here…"

Her hands snug under his shirt. She sought his warmth for comfort.

"I feel like that having a mom is really essential… even when I didn't live with her anymore, at least I knew she was there. I could call her or email her whenever I wanted to...but now, I can't ever do that again Jake?"

"I know what you mean, Bells. I have been feeling like this for a really long time," he said.

Seeing her so sad brought back all of his own sad memories. He swallowed as he felt a lump in his throat.

A new flood of tears erupted from her eyes. Sobs racked her body. She started to hiccup. "I will never be able to tell her about us."

Jake ran his hands up and down her sides, trying to soothe her. He made crooning noises that eventually turned into some kind of canine purr. It vibrated through his chest and actually helped Bella to calm down.

Slowly, her tears subsided.

After a while, Bella wiggled out of his embrace. She blew her nose and dried her tearstained face. Her face was red, her eyes were puffy, and she felt so exhausted. "I'm sorry for ruining your shirt, Jake."

"I don't care, probably would have taken it off anyway." He smiled at her, simply lifted her and put her in the passenger seat. "I'm going to drive, honey. You just get some rest."

The drove down the highway in silence. Eventually, Jake said, "Dealing with my mom's death got better the longer she was gone. My Dad gave his best, but he could never really replace her."

Outside it was clouded. The weather reflected their gloomy mood.

"You know I hated Mother's Days. Still do actually." Jake shared some more memories. He looked at her with serious eyes.

She caught a glimpse of the man he was about to be in the near future. It took her breath away.

"All the other kids used to draw pictures, or were cutting, gluing, and folding stuff for their moms. They would hang up on the fridge, and I had to stick it to her grave stone. The next time I would visit her grave, the wind or the rain had completely destroyed everything I had made for her, so I stopped making handicrafts for her the following year.

~oOo~

They drove in silence for the next few hours. Each of them deeply in thought, plus Bella took the opportunity to close her eyes some, trying to get some needed rest.

"What is your favorite memory of your mom?" Bella asked, as they took a driving break in the early afternoon and ate some Subway sandwiches in the warm afternoon sun. They were lying on a blanket Bella had taken out of the trunk earlier.

"I have several, Bells. I think my mom was very special. She had lived for making us happy, but one of my favorite moments was when she snuggled up to me in bed and read stories to me at night.

Most of the time I could not wait to go to bed, just to have her for myself and listen to her stories. She was animated and was able to make me laugh so hard as much as she made me cry. The stories she told were not always happy ones", he said.

Bella looked at him, shocked a little. "She made you cry, Jake?"

"Well, sometimes I cried for the person in the story she had just told me," Jacob explained. "I always hated when someone was in pain or went through a rough time. But most of the times, her stories were full of life and love."

"I think you got your sunny personality from your mom, Jake." Bella mused.

She pressed her face into his chest, inhaling his scent. She loved the way he smelled. It was unique; somewhat outdoorsy, like a forest smelled after a rain shower on a hot sunny summer day.

They napped for a couple of minutes before they returned to the car and drove on.

"What is your fondest memory of your mom, Bells?"

Bella thought for a while. "Actually, it's baking in my grandma Marie's kitchen. When I started school, I had a really hard time understanding how reading and writing worked."

"No way, Bells!" Jake called out in utter disbelief. "You're a glutton for books!"

"Stop looking at me like that. It's the truth!" Bella waved her hands animatedly. "The letters would only ever dance across the pages… so my mom came up with the idea of combining learning with physical activities. We would lay out the alphabet with pebbles or cereals. Or she made me dance the ABC song…"

Bella laughed. "I was so clumsy. I used to fall over and hurt myself. My grandma finally created a cooking book just for me. Together we would study a new recipe each weekend and then I cooked or baked it. Around the time I was in 3rd grade it finally clicked and reading finally made sense to me and I was pretty good at cooking and baking, too."

They drove on in a comfortable silence, both dwelling on their memories and thoughts.

"I'm not sure, but I think I remember your mom, too," Bella said eventually.

Jake cast a quick curious look at her, while still focusing at the road.

"From what my mom told me there was this one day when your dad and mom and my parents took a walk together at first beach. The twins were about four, I was almost two. Your sisters and I were running and I fell." Bella closed her eyes, concentrating hard to get better access to that particular memory. She realized, it must be one of her earliest childhood memories.

Before her eyes, she saw the grey, stony beach. She remembered the salty smell of the ocean. It had been cold that day. "I still know how much my knee hurt. Your mom picked me up. It's kinda fuzzy, but I can remember her bending down to me and picking me up. Her hair blew into my face. It smelled like sunshine. She had the most beautiful black hair."

Bella stopped talking and looked at Jake.

He was biting his lip as he brought the car to a stop. There was no way he could go on driving right now.

"That she had," he finally said, his voice breaking with emotion. "Sometimes she would let me braid it."

~oOo~

They stopped in Cody, Wyoming, a couple of miles outside Yellowstone National Park.

Bella was in desperate need of a shower.

They had talked about their moms almost all day. She felt better somehow but she always felt better when Jake was there to talk to. He seemed to always be able to lift her worries, but grieving for her mother would take some time. She was well aware of it. As long as she had him by her side, she was going to be alright, she just knew it.

Grieving was a strange thing, Bella thought, emotions going every which way. It was exhausting.

Eventually, she dug out the shoebox out of the trunk of the car, which held Sarah Black's pictures. She had put it away to wait for just the right moment to share with him. She placed the box next to _her_ side of the bed. She always slept on the side that faced the window. Jake always slept on the side which faced the door.

After they both had a shower, they got dressed and had dinner. Jake provided them with a couple more brochures which they studied to find the best route through Yellowstone and what they wanted to see. Bella was very interested in seeing the Grand Prismatic Spring. Jake was more interested in the wild life. He was looking forward to seeing black bears, bison, elks and of course the wolves.

~oOo~

"I've got something to show you." Bella announced as they got back to their room after dinner. Bella sat down on the bed and patted the space next to her.

Jake came around and sat down beside her. He looked at the box with open curiosity.

She gave him the shoebox, but held her hand over it, so he couldn't open it just yet.

"I found this in my mom's closet," Bella explained. "My mom kept all the pictures from the time when she lived in Forks. There are lots of pics that have your mom in them." She was excited to show him and nervous about how he would take it. She could feel her heart in her throat. "I want to give them to you."

Jake sat there for a moment with his eyes closed, trying to fight down that lump in his throat. This day had been so emotional already, and now he was about to see pictures of his mom. He didn't have that many pictures of his mom. He felt kind of overwhelmed.

"Don't you want to see what's in there?" Bella asked timidly.

Jake answered truthfully. "I'm very nervous. I'm afraid I'm gonna cry..." His voice was raspy, his hands were clammy. He looked so very young. Insecure. Vulnerable even.

He looked his real age for once.

He had been strong for her all through the last week, and through those last months when he put her back together.

She wondered how much she had really hurt him with her disappearing act. She wondered what it must have done to him, seeing her wallow in her depression.

Bella felt the need to protect him for once. She put both her arms around his waist. "I've got you. I'm here for you."

He took a deep breath and opened the lid.

There she was, his mom, looking at him right from the top pic.

Gingerly, Jake pulled out the stack of pictures, delicately holding them in his huge hands. His long fingers traced the face of his mom tenderly.

Slowly, he looked through each and every pic, often smiling, sometimes sighing sadly. Finally, he found the letter.

"What's that?" he asked as he put all the pictures back in the box but kept the letter in his hand.

"Obviously, my mom left Forks without telling your mom good-bye. This letter is from your mom, basically telling my mom off."

Jake sniffed at the envelope in the hope to catch a trace of her scent. He found none. It only smelled like paper and ink and kinda old and stale.

A couple of pictures fell out of the envelope and tumbled onto the floor. He bent down and picked them up. Looking at the pictures, he laughed. "Oh, that's me."

"Your mom looks so proud, Jake," Bella said.

"And Rach looks as if she'd rather smother me with that pillow." Jake pointed at the little grim-looking, pigtailed girl in the background.

"I almost forgot how my mom's handwriting looks like." he murmured as he unfolded the letter. Her handwriting was neat, the script slightly slanting to the right with tall upper strokes. Yeah, it was beautiful, unlike his own chicken scratch.

He read through the text with a tilted head, narrowed eyes and a slight frown. Towards the end, he nodded with a hint of a smile and understanding dawning on his face. "She would have forgiven your mom, you know? She just wanted to understand why your mom left without saying a word."

Suddenly, his lips were on hers. His hands tangled in her hair. He kissed her with passion. "Thank you," he murmured against her mouth. "It means the world to me."

Bella realized something. Jacob helped her heal. Heal from the pain Edward and his family inflicted on her when they left. Helped her to deal with the loss of her mother, even though he had plenty of his own wounds. His wounds were different from hers and he also struggled to deal with them.

In her own way, she helped him as well and she intended to do even more so in the future. He needed her just as much as she was needing him.

~oOO~

The next morning they took the U.S. 20 from Cody, Wyoming, to the Yellowstone East Entrance.

Due to the high elevation the weather still had a very wintery feel. Cold winds gusted from the north. On the side of the road snowy patches were to be seen, but nature was awakening. The first spring flowers rose from the ground. The air smelled fresh and green.

Bella was dressed in boots, a wool hat and several warm layers of clothes underneath her anorak. Jake had changed into his boots, a pair of jeans and a simple long sleeved shirt. He didn't need much more than this.

The scenery was spectacular.

The smell of Old Faithful almost made Jake sick. The sulfuric stink was overwhelming his olfactory sense. However, he held out to see the geyser erupt and thought it very impressive.

Bella was fascinated with the Grand Prismatic Spring. The water in the middle of the spring was a brilliant blue surrounded by rings of vivid colors ranging from red to green. The water was so hot in the middle it was supposed to melt the flesh off your bones.

The Mammoth Hot Springs were an amazing sight. The whole area was an array of travertine terraces. Flowing water spilled over the colorfully streaked terraces, resulting in gentle cascades.

They spontaneously parked their car at the Visitor's Center and watched a film, browsed the history exhibit, and walked through the upstairs wildlife museum.

After having a little picnic, the wind was rough outside and Bella stayed huddled into Jake's side, they continued their journey through Yellowstone.

Jake really had a gift of discovering wildlife along the road. He made her aware of a lonely elk, a small herd of antelopes and a couple of big horn sheep. He also saw and could name all kinds of birds flying across them in the sky.

At some point, Jake made her stop the car and got out. He sniffed the air and smiled. "Do you trust me?" he asked.

"Always," she said. She put her hand in his and he helped her out of the car. She zipped up her anorak and pulled on her hat.

Jake swept her up into his arms and without thinking twice, walked straight into the forest. He moved fast and swift, running up a rather steep hillside without much effort. Finally, he stopped just outside a small clearing. He took a deep breath and tilted his head to the side, straining his ears.

"What are we doing?" she whispered.

He put a finger over her lips, indicating for her to be silent. He crouched down and pulled her down with him.

After a while, a black bear appeared on the other side of the clearing. A couple of seconds later a set of cubs tumbled out of the forrest. Watched over by their mom, the two cubs wrestled with each other. They were still very tiny and they moved with an adorable clumsiness that made Bella's heart melt.

"How did you know?" She mouthed at him.

He tapped his nose, grinning proudly.

They watched the cubs play and mock-fight until their mother disappeared back into the forest, her young following after her.

Bella was so in awe, she couldn't stop retelling Jake what she had seen and how much she had liked it until they reached the motel where they would sleep that night.

"One day," Bella said, gazing out of the window and watching the sun going down behind the trees. "One day, I want us to come back here and spend a real vacation here. We didn't even see half of it, Jake!"

They spent a good part of the night kissing and making out. Giving into their physical attraction felt so good and it strengthened their emotional bond.

~oOO~

They arrived in Cheney, Washington, the next day around 6 pm. It was the last night before they would be back in Forks.

Jake left so he could phase to check the area and talk to Sam.

Bella called her father and told him where they were and when to expect them at home tomorrow.

She was nervous. She knew when she was home there would be some serious talking with her dad about her bad decisions concerning Edward and the consequences of her running away with Alice.

Also, she would return into the normalcy of her everyday life which meant she wouldn't be able to sleep in Jake's arms at night anymore. She would thoroughly miss that and she already dreaded saying good-bye to Jake, even when he lived only a 20 minutes' drive away from her.

Would their dads allow them to spend the nights together on the weekends?

She didn't want to go back to school, didn't want to deal with the likes of Jessica Stanley and Lauren Mallory, didn't want to hear the rumors about the possible reasons of her running away, and didn't want to see the pitying glances that were most likely to come when people would hear about her mom's death.

She wanted to stay on the road. With Jake. And to be free. Sort of.

Bella sighed.

She took a hot shower and then got dressed in her pajamas. She had been thinking about Jake in a total new way. She was hugely attracted to him physically, as well as emotionally. How could she have been that blind before?

Bella was glad that Renee had her on the pill before she let her move to Forks, she continued thinking. So protection was covered, just in case.

She wanted this night to count. Wanted it to be a night they would both remember fondly. She wanted this night to be special.

But she also reminded herself that this last night on the road was also a new beginning of their love. Life would be different for both of them from now on and she intended on making it work for themselves, both of their dads, and the pack.

When Jake returned, she was tied in knots. All her vague fears and concerns boiled down to one point; this was their last night together without having to explain anything to anyone; and, she didn't want this to end.

Bella got up from the bed and walked towards him.

"Bella, are you alright?" he asked concerned, picking up on her nervousness right away. Of course he would, she thought smiling to herself.

She stopped in front of him and reached up to cup his face between her hands. She took a deep breath and asked, "Do you want us... to make... love?" A deep blush started to creep up her neck and face, but she kept holding his gaze.

His eyes widened. "Bells?"

"Do you want to... have sex... with me?" She pressed her hands flat on his chest, slightly pushing him against the wall behind him. She tried being seductive, but she was just too nervous to really pull it off.

"I... ah..." He said, stopped, swallowed, and started anew. "What do _you_ want, Bella?" His voice dropped low, so deliciously low, it made that part deep in her stomach clench with anticipation.

Her face had to be fiery red by now with all the blood pooling in her about sex was so far out of her comfort zone, but it was Jake she was talking to and she really, really wanted this. She wanted to share this intimacy with Jake, so she pushed through her discomfort and told him.

"I want to do this with you, Jake. I want us to make love."

There was no need for further talking.

Jake took her hand and led her to the bed. He kissed her and pulled her down next to him.

Wasting no time, he pulled her pajama top over her head. He kissed her neck and slowly moved down until he reached her breasts. His lips ghosted over a rosy nipple which turned into a stiff peak.

His mouth closed over it, sucking gently while his other hand smoothed down her side and slipped inside her pajama pants, caressing her soft skin.

She moaned and arched into his touch.

She grabbed his hair and gently tugged. He looked up at her. "Jake, I want to... let me... touch you."

Her hands were on his chest instantly. He was still naked from the waist up after phasing. She loved the feel of his skin under her hands. Scorching hot and smooth, it stretched over taut muscles.

He was so beautiful. His body was perfection.

She kissed her way along his collarbone to his sternum. She assumed his nipples would be sensitive just the same as hers, and so she bent down to take his nipple into her mouth. As she licked at it, he threw his head back with a deep groan. His hips came off the bed.

She unbuttoned his jeans. He helped her slide them down his legs. She stared at his erection when it bobbed against his stomach. He was big. Like, really big. How would that fit inside of her?

Jake reached out and pulled her down to his side. He started kissing her again. His hands roamed her body, making her skin tingle. His thigh slipped between her legs, pressing against her mound, and soon she found herself rubbing against him.

"Bella," he groaned. He tugged at the waistband of her pajama pants, wanting it off. He was too impatient. The fabric tore apart.

Bella giggled, but then his lips were on her breasts once again and his hand between her legs. She could feel how wet she was. He could slide through her folds effortlessly.

"You're so wet, honey," Jake said with that deep and husky voice that made her shiver. He slipped a finger inside her and gently moved it in and out.

He slipped a second finger inside of her. He did something with his fingers which felt so good, her toes curled.

"Ooh..." she moaned and closed her hand around his erection. He was so different here from the rest of his body. Hard, hot and yet silky. She moved her hand up and down his shaft.

"Bella," he said with a groan. "You feel very good... " In all of his wet dreams of her, of their first time, he would have never imagine it being this wonderful. She felt like sheer heaven and he wanted to stay like this always.

Hearing his voice, his words, made her shiver with excitement. She didn't want to wait any longer, and she needed to show him how much she wanted him.

Bravely, she climbed on top of him.

He grabbed her hips. Knowing it would probably hurt her, made him feel uneasy. At the same time, he wanted to know how she would feel wrapped around him.

She aligned him with her entrance and slowly lowered herself onto him.

It did hurt, but not unbearably so. She felt a burning sensation, both from his heat and the unfamiliar intrusion, as she stretched around to accommodate to his size. She was so tight, she could feel every ridge and vein of his length as she pushed down slowly.

"Oh, God," Jake said with a big sigh. He lifted his head to see what she was doing. It was too much. He slid his eyes shut. She is going to kill him, he was sure. He had never felt anything like this before in his life, and he hoped that she felt the same.

Her thighs trembled. She reached for his hands to have something to hold onto.

He saw sweat beats rolling down her cheek, he knew it must hurt.

"Shhh, Bells, slow down. Hold still for just a moment so your body can adjust... " he suggested. Simultaneously, he was fighting with himself not to plunge into her.

After a moment of rest, he started moving ever so slow until he felt something inside her give and then he was impossibly deep inside of her.

She froze again, panting. She looked at him and saw the awe on his face. Tears of happiness built in her eyes, and she noticed the wet shine in his as well. "Jake?" she whispered. She felt so full. He was inside of her; she had taken him all in. She was overcome with emotion.

"Bella... honey... can you move... I don't...ah..." he babbled. His muscles were straining with the effort to lay still and let her adjust. She could tell that he was holding back big time.

She deliberately tried to relax. She inhaled and then exhaled slowly. She noticed that the burn had stopped. She squeezed her walls for good measure to be sure and then she heard Jake moaning.

She was amazed with the look of pure pleasure and total concentration on his face. Seeing him like that gave her a huge rush. It made those muscles inside her contract even more.

Jacob thought she might squeeze the sheer life out of him.

She coated him with a new flood of her wetness.

He groaned again. "Oh...My...God!...Bells... baby... please."

Bella felt powerful despite her slight discomfort. She circled her hips experimentally. She lifted herself up and slid back down onto him. And up. And down.

She worked up to a slow rhythm. It started to feel really good now that she got used to him. On her next upward move, just the tip of his length remained inside of her until she bravely dropped back down hard.

She cried out. He had tapped a spot inside her that almost made her go cross-eyed.

"Fuck!" He swore and his hips jerked, almost pushing her off. "Do that again."

She pushed up again, using more strength now.

On her downward move, he let go of her hands and grabbed her thighs. He simply lifted her and then pulled her down on his length the way he needed it.

He set the pace now and it was a whole lot faster and she was glad to hand over control to him.

Something built inside her with every thrust.

He sensed the change in her breathing pattern, assuming she liked the deeper, faster thrusts. However, he couldn't hold out much longer. He felt the foreboding tingle race through his body and his balls tighten. "Bells… are you... close?... I'm gonna… come soon."

Her breath hitched at his words. She was so turned on, her fingers automatically found her little hard nub between her legs and she rubbed it, hesitatingly first then faster and harder. She was slick and swollen, and touching herself had never felt so good. She was climbing fast towards her orgasm. She wanted to go over the edge together with him.

"Oh, shit," he groaned and stared with wonder, _damn, she was touching herself. Where all his fantasies of her coming true tonight?_ Watching her pleasure herself, while she was riding him, looking more beautiful than he could ever imagine just did him in. His thrusts were erratic now, there was nothing but her and pleasure.

He erupted with a bellow.

She could hardly breathe. The look of pure rapture in his face brought her over the edge. She threw her head back. Her body shuddered above him, once...twice...

"Bells," he groaned. "YES! This is it... ahh!"

~oOO~

Morning had arrived way too quickly.

Neither one of them gotten much sleep, as they had made love two more times and talked for almost the rest of the night. They felt closer to each other by the minute. They were in harmony and union. They fit perfectly with each other.

Outside, the sky looked heavy with rainclouds. She did not care for getting out of bed just yet. They were comfortably snuggled into each other's arms.

Jake ignored the noise his stomach was already making, and Bella tried to ignore that she really needed to go pee.

"Five more minutes," she whispered into Jake's chest, closing her eyes again.

"I wish we could just stay here," she murmured with her eyes still closed. "But I guess we need to feed you soon. It's getting mighty loud in there." She poked her finger into his ribcage.

He smiled and moved slightly so their heads were the same height. He kissed her eyes gently. "Come on, Bells. Let's get up and find us some food. I am famished. You sure worked me hard last night," he teased her.

"Ha! Don't tell me you did not enjoy that, Mr. Black," she teased right back. She jumped out of bed unexpected, beating him to the bathroom and locked the door quickly.

They had ended up in the shower, not able to resist the urge to make love once more. Jake finally got to eat his breakfast an hour later and downed a whole pot of coffee with his food. They checked out of the hotel another thirty minutes after that and stopped down the street at a gas station to fill up the Jetta.

During breakfast, Bella had a thought about Renee's ashes. Renee never cared for Forks, or Washington as a whole, so why should that be her final resting place she had wondered and decided to discuss it with Jake.

He swallowed his Hash Browns quickly and looked at her, contemplating her words. "What do you have in mind, Bells?"

"Renee loved to travel. She loved to explore and she did love the ocean. What if we spread her ashes in the Pacific?, That way, she will always be travelling. She will always be close in a way too. Does that sound crazy, Jake?"

He shook his head, understanding where she was coming from. "Renee would be free, but you'd still have a place to go to..."

"Yes," she said quietly. He understood perfectly.

However, before Bella would make a final decision, she would talk to Charlie and ask for his opinion too.

Until then, the plan was to toss Renee's ashes over the Pacific. First beach seemed like the perfect spot to do so, but they'd need to ask Billy's permission, since it was Quileute land.

~oOO~

The pack had been waiting for them on the edge of the thick forest, which lined each side of the road leading into Forks. They had seen how Jacob's and Bella's relationship had developed, every time Jake phased to check in. Naturally, Jake had blocked certain private moments, but based on their respective _afterglow,_ the pack pretty much figured things out.

They decided to greet the couple and welcome Bella in their midst, especially since Bella had really come a long way. She was part of their family now. They were all very close with each other, somewhat forced into relationships because this is what the spirits had asked of them, but everybody appreciated their heritage and embraced their fate.

There were issues, no doubt, but in the end of the day they all were family and had each other's back.

Jake heard his pack howling 3 miles out. He really was excited to get back home where he felt most comfortable and now he had his girl. Life could hardly get any better.

He told Bella his brothers and sister are waiting for them and how excited they were that she was finally home with him.

Jake slowed the car down and pulled into a small clearing on the side of the road. He got out of the car and walked around it to open Bella's door. When she took his hand, and gotten out of the car, she saw the huge smile spread all across his face.

Then she heard laughter come out of the forest, as one by one the pack walked into the clearing.

"Don't worry Bella, or are you really afraid of some big bad wolves?" Quil asked as he gave her a huge bear hug.

One by one hugged her and told her how sorry they were about the loss of her mom. Then she got kissed, hugged some more, teased, and even tossed in the air until Jacob told them enough!

Sam had explained to her that Charlie is waiting for her and to get a move on home.

Ten minutes after that, Jake pulled the Jetta into Charlie's driveway.

Charlie waited in front of the house as they arrived. Bella jumped out of the car and flew into his waiting arms. He held her for a really long time. Neither one of them could stop tears from rolling down their faces, but Charlie composed himself quickly, blew his nose into his hanky as he turned around to Jake with a slap on his shoulder, and to everyone's surprise, including himself, he pulled him in for a hug too.

"Thank you, son," he said quietly.

Charlie carried Renee's urn into the house and put it on the mantle shelf. He looked at the urn for a long time, deeply lost in his thoughts. It was his way of saying goodbye.

Bella had told him what she had discussed with Jake about tossing Renee's ashes into the Pacific, and Charlie thought it was a great idea. They planned on having a small ceremony in a couple of weeks at First Beach, setting Renee free and having a bonfire after to celebrate her life.

~oOO~

The following month, Bella and Jake sat in his garage.

It looked and smelt and felt familiar here, warm, welcoming and homey. However, sitting here had also a new feeling to it. It spoke of an promising and exciting new life with Jake. They had laid the foundation of a relationship that had the potential to grow, to become indestructible with each day, with each milestone, with each obstacle life would throw their way. She couldn't wait for it to really start.

She had a completely new future now, one that was natural.

Only a couple of weeks ago, she had made no plans for her future whatsoever (apart from desperately wanting to be a vampire) since everything had only always revolved around Edward and what he thought were the right things for her to do. He had talked about going to some fancy college together, which he would have chosen and would have paid for it, no matter how uncomfortable that might have made her. She would have worn designer clothes which Alice seemed to put her in, but Bella didn't even care about that. And after being turned-how dumb had she been by the way-they would all have been stagnant and never anything more for the rest of their eternal lives.

Bella was horrified with herself. She would have traded her real family and loving friends for living an artificial life with an artificial family.

How did she not see this much sooner?

No, this simply was no option for her any longer. She wanted to make her own decisions. Wanted to ask Jake for his opinion, wanted to make plans for a real future, and have her own family one day. She wanted to grow old, feel the lines in her face and know that she was able to build something good, leave a real legacy behind. Most of all, she could see this future with Jake by her side, always.

Her heart and soul belonged to him.

For now, she contemplated graduating. She had missed too much with her depression and now again, with the time away from school after her mom's deaths.

She would have to work overtime to catch up on missed work. She may even have to go to summer school in order to receive all of her needed credits, but she was going to do what it takes.

Jake could catch up with her. She was going to see to that and if they would get tutors to help him if she was too tied up with her own work. . Jake would only be one year behind her and would graduate hopefully the following summer.

She could do this online college thing during his senior year and later, maybe she and Jake could go to college together. If he wanted to go to college. She was sure he could totally pull it off.

Bella leaned back in that ancient car seat Jake had dragged into his garage just yesterday. She watched him tinker with some strange part on his Rabbit.

She smiled.

They had come a long way. She had learned so much about herself. This trip had made her aware of her mortality, but in a good way. She had learned to appreciate how precious life was and she really wanted to live in a way that made each and every day count.

Their trip across the country to come back home was truly their very own Road To Happiness….

.

 **The End**


End file.
